day 5

i'm on a roll here. odd. hittin' all the odd days. 1,3,5.
what?
ah, i ain't even yet. no way. today, i heard myself talking- to a neighbor, to a friend. tmi. too much information?
i come from the world of complete and total privacy, secrecy is probably a much better way to describe it. then, along comes age and angst and spilling over to the opposite extreme.
but today is a good day, a sunny day. i liked today.
ahhhh.
a man. i had, have still i suppose, a crush on. as do a million other women. he and i, in our separate worlds, we emailed back and forth-twice so far. no, i did not find him on a dating site. i found him at the movies. as did the million other women. a documentary he made called "may i be frank." amazing, fun, hippie, bohemian, blasphemous tale of transformation.
so, two emails, it's his turn now and once again, no word. i don't care as much. i was obsessed. i had to give that up. obsession. not a good thing. worse than a couple gallons of ice cream in one sitting. yep. obsession sits in your brain and clogs up every nerve and emotion till all is as frozen as the ice cream i didn't eat!
but i think about him. occasionally. will we ever meet again? hmmmm. maybe. will i blush again like i did the first time i spoke to him. probably. crushes. crushes are fun. flirting is good. obsession-no good- obsession is the meltdown.